For months now, I have been wearing a mask when I cannot socially distance. Since I don’t go out unless I have to, my mask-wearing largely involves trips to the grocery store. But I have worn it enough now to start to notice things about myself and others. If you are an observer of human behavior as I am, this highly unusual phenomenon offers an abundance of opportunities to gain insights. Here are just a few things that I have observed:
I miss seeing people’s smiles. Because of this, I have compensated by looking at their eyes to see if they are smiling behind that mask. If you look closely, you will see that the corners of the eyes crinkle a bit and our eyes sparkle a little when we really mean the smile hidden by our mask. Because of this, I continue to make smiling a deliberate action as much as I can, in the hope that others will notice that we can still share this connection.
People don’t look at you. I’m not sure why, but it is hard to get someone to look directly at you even when you greet them. They look down and away. Perhaps it embarrasses them to be seen in a mask or see another person wear theirs. Despite this, I try to make eye contact as much as I can to try to establish a human connection.
I have trouble hearing. Yes, I am getting older and my husband accuses me of losing my hearing. So perhaps that is true, but I have noticed that everyone is having the same trouble. People do sound a little muffled when they speak, but I think it is also that we have underestimated how much we rely on watching people’s faces when they speak. We get a lot of visual clues when we are able to see a person’s face, clues that help us understand what people are actually saying as well as their intentions behind the words. When this happens to me, I make a joke and ask the person to repeat what they said. It’s amazing how quickly, regardless of their age, they say, “I’m having trouble hearing, too.”
I could care less what I look like. I’m not particularly vain, but in the past when I went to run errands, such as going to the grocery store, I would at least put on some lipstick and maybe some mascara. But now, of course, lipstick is definitely not needed. I’ve found that I don’t really take time to do anything else either. It is kind of liberating not to worry about that. As I look around, almost everyone else is doing the same thing.
Type of mask is important. I had no idea that there could be so many different types of masks. At first I ordered lots of boxes of masks without a thought as to whether they would fit or be comfortable. Since then, I have found that it does make a difference what type of mask you wear. For example, paper masks cause my glasses to fog. And my husband finds some masks too small for him. Who knew?
How often I touch my face. It seems as soon as I put on my mask I need to scratch my nose. Well as you know, that is problematic. I would have to sanitize or wash my hands before and after that. By then, the urge is gone. Instead of going through all of that, I have learned to take a few deep breaths and hope that the urge goes away. And guess what? It does.
I put masks everywhere just in case. I am so paranoid about showing up without my mask that I have them everywhere – in my car, by the door to the garage, in my purse, and even in my golf bag.
I give them as gifts. When I find an especially functional and comfortable mask, I order a bunch of them to give as gifts. Who would have ever thought something like that would be so appreciated as a gift?
I notice when someone is not wearing a mask. At first, I felt a little strange when I was among just a few people wearing a mask. Now, it makes me feel uncomfortable to see others who are not wearing them. It is amazing how quickly our perspective can change — from what we perceive as normal to a new normal.
I appreciate those who have to wear a mask all day for their work. Whenever I see someone wearing a mask while working, I thank them for doing so and tell them how much I appreciate how difficult this must be for them.
Grateful for deep, mask-free breaths. I am so grateful when I get in my car or get home and I can safely take off my mask, that I take a few slow, grateful mask-free breaths. And, I say a silent prayer that we will all be safe and this will be over soon.
Our lives have changed quite possibly forever. And masks are highly likely to be part of that life. Because of this, I have made the choice to accept it and turn this experience into a mindfulness practice. Putting my mask on is a reminder to tune my attention to the present moment. Wearing a mask is a trigger for me to tune into my feelings, consider how others might be feeling, and be grateful for others who wear a mask for our safety and health. How about you? What have you noticed?