What’s the deal with the run on toilet paper? (No pun intended.) As far as I know, this virus is not gastrological. So why did everyone decide that they need a basketful of this particular product? While many experts have sought to explain this phenomenon with various theories, it might be as simple as this, it’s our way of trying to exert control in a world that feels out of control.
On a recent visit to the grocery store, I was prepared to “stock up” with supplies that my husband and I might need for a couple of weeks. For someone who doesn’t do that much cooking this was especially challenging, but I felt pretty good about my list.
As I entered the grocery store, the panic and fear were palatable. I could feel my own heart rate rise and looked at my relatively short list and began to wonder if I had underestimated what I should buy. All kinds of thoughts entered my mind. What if they close the grocery store? What would we do if that happened?
To make matters worse, I saw someone with a cart full of bottled water go by and saw that the aisle with water was empty. My mind immediately went to, “What does water have to do with the virus? Could it impact our water supply?”. Well, you get the drift. I went down the irrational path that you might be familiar with.
Fortunately, I recognized that I was experiencing emotional contagion. In other words, what I was feeling and thinking did not reflect reality. I recognized that I needed to take a deep breath and refocused my attention on what I realistically needed for the next week or two. I did this by taking a few breaths and saying to myself, “pause and refocus on your list, not on what everybody else is doing.”
I have to say this worked for a while until I went down the dried bean aisle and I saw someone loading up their cart with bags and bags of dried beans. This time my mind went to humor. I wondered if they knew how to cook them and how long you have to soak them. Having this humorous thought broke the chain of emotional contagion long enough for me to consider another explanation for this person’s behavior. Perhaps they were purchasing these beans for food boxes or for a food bank. This simple shift in focus allowed me to quickly move from panic and judgment to compassion. I may never know why he was really buying all these beans, but does it matter? Not really. After all, we are only responsible for our own behavior.
How to Refocus Your Thoughts & Gain Perspective
The following is a simple exercise you can do to prepare for the highly likely event that you are triggered by others’ actions or emotions.
When you feel an emotion such as fear or anxiety start to arise, take a breath and ask yourself, “what am I feeling?”. Sometimes just labeling the emotion provides distance between yourself and the emotion.
From this place, you can ask yourself:
Is what I am feeling real?
What facts do I have that this emotion might not be true?
Based on what I know right now, what is the most appropriate action?
Even a brief pause like this can give you the needed perspective to do what is best for you and your family, as well as others. During this uncertain time, we hope you will pause before you purchase something out of fear and anxiety. If we only purchase what we really need, there will be enough for all of us.