I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “we are in this together” numerous times over the past few weeks. I also saw this quote recently from Nelson Mandela that seems to provide additional meaning into this ubiquitous phrase, “Your freedom and mine cannot be separated”.
We, as Americans, are so independent. We reject being told what to do even when it is good for us and good for others. However, I am both encouraged and discouraged from what I am seeing lately. Perhaps, you are as well. I’ve seen people come together and rally around a greater “we”, including healthcare workers and those who are less fortunate and need food. I’ve also seen hoarding of toilet paper and other selfish behaviors. Yet, seeing that young man on the beach in Florida, as he completely missed why his “freedom to be on the beach” had an impact on those he comes in contact with (and those who they come in contact with), was difficult to watch.
Unfortunately, this young man was defining his “we” quite narrowly. He is not alone. It isn’t just young and inexperienced people who have this belief and act this way. Yet, instead of jumping to conclusions or villainizing people who have beliefs different than ours, perhaps it might be helpful to understand what are the underlying processes that lead individuals to failing to recognize how their freedom is linked to others.
Not to single this young man out, but his narrow definition of the greater “we” might be a good example of others who reject the concept that “we are all in this together”. When we narrowly identify the group that we belong to as our immediate family and close friends, we miss out on the consequences of our actions to those in the broader social circle. Bottom line, we fail to align with the current mantra of “we are in this together.”
I invite you to consider how you define your “we”. Is it your family, your close friends, your greater social circle, your hometown, or bigger than that? Does it depend on the situation? Does it depend upon the actions needed and the consequences at stake? Take a moment and reflect on how you can broaden your perspective in relation to our current situation today. Perhaps you might expand your “we” to include people you don’t know, the people outside of your community, then to everyone in our country, and even further to people across the globe.
To help you broaden your perspective, below is a version of a Loving-Kindness meditation that you might find useful in reconsidering the “we” in your life and to help heal the world.
Reference
Kachanoff, F. J., Wohl, M. J., Koestner, R., & Taylor, D. M. (2019). Them, Us, and I: How Group Contexts Influence Basic Psychological Needs. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 0963721419884318.