Living in a place of gratitude helps us focus on what’s good and positive in ourselves and has many advantages to help us thrive. When we live in a place of gratitude, we find that our relationships are more robust, and we can bounce back from difficult times. However, when we use our gratitude practice to ignore our feelings or justify an awful experience, “because at least I’m not as bad off as someone else,” it can be destructive to our well-being.

Here are a few signs that your gratitude practice is off track. If you:

Overlook red flags in relationships.
Find yourself saying, “well, at least I’m not in that situation,” to invalidate your negative feelings.
Have written something like this in your journal, “Be grateful for what you have because someone else has it worse.”
Are pretending to be grateful to “fake it until you make it”, you may be burying your genuine feelings or worsening your situation.
Struggle to find something to be authentically grateful for, then look for small things. Think small, not big.
Have a habit of stuffing down emotions through food, shallow breathing, or feelings of resentment.

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If you find that your practice is one that results in you burying your current or past psychological or physical pain, perhaps it is time to seek professional assistance. There is no shame in finding that our best efforts to help ourselves fail. It is a sign of strength and courage to seek help. You may find that seeking help is what you need to shift your heart and begin experiencing authentic gratitude.